1 00:00:04,755 --> 00:00:05,965 Sir, you wanted to see me? 2 00:00:06,005 --> 00:00:07,466 Yes, I have an assignment for you. 3 00:00:07,508 --> 00:00:08,843 I'm afraid it's not a pleasant one. 4 00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,594 Oh, my God. Please tell me it's not-- 5 00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:12,888 Yes, it's Hitchcock related. 6 00:00:12,930 --> 00:00:14,306 Son of a bitch. 7 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,099 Detective Hitchcock is set to testify 8 00:00:16,141 --> 00:00:17,058 in court this afternoon. 9 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:18,602 It's an important case, 10 00:00:18,644 --> 00:00:20,479 and I'd rather not get another call from the DA 11 00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:23,440 saying he showed up, "covered in condiments." 12 00:00:23,482 --> 00:00:25,024 So you want me to keep Hitchcock 13 00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:27,152 from spilling on himself for the rest of the day? 14 00:00:27,194 --> 00:00:28,529 We both know that's impossible. 15 00:00:28,570 --> 00:00:30,572 - I'm counting on you. - I won't do it. 16 00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:33,074 - There's nobody else I trust. - What you're asking is insane. 17 00:00:33,116 --> 00:00:35,369 - It's a suicide mission! - I'm not asking. 18 00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:37,287 - Then prepare for death. - You've lost your mind! 19 00:00:37,329 --> 00:00:39,623 This is a direct order, Detective! Get in line! 20 00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:41,625 You guys startled Hitchcock. Hey. 21 00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:44,545 of spaghetti sauce on himself. He spilled two full jars 22 00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:45,921 Thanks a lot, fellas. 23 00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:49,174 [theme music playing] 24 00:01:05,983 --> 00:01:08,318 Ames, super important question. 25 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:09,987 Which one of these shirts should I wear to dinner 26 00:01:10,029 --> 00:01:11,947 - Those are exactly the same. - with your mom tonight? 27 00:01:11,989 --> 00:01:13,448 I have a signature look, Rosa. 28 00:01:13,490 --> 00:01:14,950 {\an8}Put on a t-shirt for all I care. 29 00:01:14,992 --> 00:01:16,035 {\an8}It doesn't matter what you wear. 30 00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:17,327 {\an8}Of course it matters. 31 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:18,954 {\an8}the smaller checks. He has to wear 32 00:01:18,996 --> 00:01:21,582 {\an8}Big checks wash him out. Where are you, Amy? 33 00:01:21,623 --> 00:01:23,959 {\an8}It doesn't matter, because the night is already ruined. 34 00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:25,252 {\an8}My stupid mother invited 35 00:01:25,293 --> 00:01:27,086 {\an8}my stupid brother David to join us. 36 00:01:27,128 --> 00:01:28,296 {\an8}I thought you liked your brothers. 37 00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:29,673 {\an8}I have seven brothers, Rosa, 38 00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:31,592 {\an8}and I like all of them except David. 39 00:01:31,633 --> 00:01:32,885 {\an8}Perfect David. 40 00:01:32,927 --> 00:01:34,219 {\an8}David graduated at the top of his class 41 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:35,512 {\an8}at the police academy. 42 00:01:35,554 --> 00:01:36,847 {\an8}David took a bullet for the mayor. 43 00:01:36,889 --> 00:01:38,473 {\an8}David bakes his own bread. 44 00:01:38,515 --> 00:01:40,392 {\an8}Ooh, and does this David have a sister? 45 00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:42,644 - Yes. Amy is his sister. - And what's her deal? 46 00:01:42,686 --> 00:01:44,021 You were at the wedding, Hitchcock. 47 00:01:44,063 --> 00:01:45,606 [Amy] I'm just gonna call and cancel. 48 00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:46,815 {\an8}I really don't want to have dinner with my mom 49 00:01:46,857 --> 00:01:48,609 {\an8}fawning all over the golden boy. 50 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:49,818 {\an8}loves you both equally. I'm sure your mom 51 00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,194 {\an8}No, she definitely doesn't. 52 00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:52,529 {\an8}My parents arrange the photos of their kids 53 00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:54,073 {\an8}by who makes them the proudest. 54 00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:55,950 {\an8}Number one goes on the mantel above the fireplace, 55 00:01:55,991 --> 00:01:57,409 {\an8}two through four on the piano, and the rest 56 00:01:57,451 --> 00:01:58,994 {\an8}- are on the staircase. - This is wack. 57 00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:00,746 {\an8}- So David's on the mantel? - Always. 58 00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:02,497 {\an8}Meanwhile, my picture gathers dust on the piano. 59 00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:03,958 The piano's not that bad. 60 00:02:03,999 --> 00:02:05,375 Nobody in the family even plays, Rosa. 61 00:02:05,417 --> 00:02:06,835 At least people use the stairs. 62 00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,879 All right, David is perfect, but so are you. 63 00:02:08,921 --> 00:02:10,672 Let's just go tonight, and I'll be your hype man. 64 00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:12,424 You know how good I am at talking you up. 65 00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:13,759 Here, watch. Hey, Scully. 66 00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:16,261 Did you know that Amy is super cool? 67 00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:18,597 your autograph, ma'am? No way. Can I get 68 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,307 - Fine, we'll go. - See? 69 00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:22,392 {\an8}What, too stuck up for your fans? 70 00:02:22,434 --> 00:02:23,978 {\an8}Ya friggin' turd! 71 00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:25,520 Hey, Captain, Sarge, 72 00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:27,064 I have a case I want to discuss with you. 73 00:02:27,106 --> 00:02:28,899 You want to talk about work in the break room? 74 00:02:28,941 --> 00:02:31,234 That's highly unorthodox, but I suppose we can give it a try. 75 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,403 OK, so I have a perp-- 76 00:02:33,445 --> 00:02:35,280 I'm sorry, this is insane. Let's talk in my office. 77 00:02:35,322 --> 00:02:36,991 Much better. All right, Boyle, 78 00:02:37,032 --> 00:02:38,199 what's this case you wanted to talk about? 79 00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:40,077 {\an8}I have a perp, Alfonso Tucker, 80 00:02:40,119 --> 00:02:41,745 {\an8}transferring into our holding cell. 81 00:02:41,787 --> 00:02:43,789 {\an8}The guy who was dealing that toxic batch of meth? 82 00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:45,874 {\an8}Yeah, and he refuses to name his supplier. 83 00:02:45,916 --> 00:02:47,001 {\an8}I want to send someone into holding, 84 00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:48,376 {\an8}undercover as a perp, 85 00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:49,461 {\an8}to see if they can get him to open up. 86 00:02:49,503 --> 00:02:51,088 {\an8}Why don't you do it? 87 00:02:51,130 --> 00:02:52,965 {\an8}about your acting abilities You're always going on 88 00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:54,842 {\an8}and that time you played Annie. 89 00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:57,427 {\an8}I'm an adult man, Sarge. I didn't play Annie. 90 00:02:57,469 --> 00:03:00,597 {\an8}I was in "Annie." I played Miss Hannigan. 91 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,933 {\an8}Unfortunately, Alfonso knows I'm a cop, 92 00:03:02,975 --> 00:03:06,353 {\an8}so I can't be Maxwell Blaze. 93 00:03:06,394 --> 00:03:08,480 {\an8}But Terry might be right for the role. 94 00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:09,982 {\an8}Ooh, that sounds fun. 95 00:03:10,024 --> 00:03:12,317 {\an8}my creative muscles. I love flexing 96 00:03:12,359 --> 00:03:14,736 In addition to flexing my actual muscles. 97 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:17,489 - What? You hate theater. - Or I could do it. 98 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,992 is just professional lying. You always say acting 99 00:03:20,034 --> 00:03:21,827 what the mission calls for, Yes, but this is 100 00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:23,286 and I'm good at it. 101 00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:24,997 went to a dinner party Kevin and I 102 00:03:25,039 --> 00:03:28,291 where we played the French parlor game "charades." 103 00:03:28,333 --> 00:03:29,668 I had to act out Elvis Presley. 104 00:03:29,710 --> 00:03:32,337 [♪♪♪] 105 00:03:32,379 --> 00:03:35,090 He's dead now, so I portrayed him as such. 106 00:03:35,132 --> 00:03:36,299 Everyone understood... 107 00:03:36,341 --> 00:03:37,551 [snaps fingers] ...immediately. 108 00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:38,969 You know, a little competition 109 00:03:39,011 --> 00:03:40,345 might bring out the best in both of you. 110 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:41,972 We'll hold auditions this afternoon. 111 00:03:42,014 --> 00:03:44,265 I'll prepare sides. 112 00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:46,267 Please wear clothes you can move in. 113 00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:49,312 {\an8}OK, let's get to the table before David gets here. 114 00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:50,898 My mother loves an early bird. 115 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,566 Hey, babe, before we go in, 116 00:03:52,607 --> 00:03:54,484 I know I said I was gonna do the whole hype man thing, but-- 117 00:03:54,526 --> 00:03:55,903 I know. 118 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,863 I shouldn't compare myself to my brother. 119 00:03:57,905 --> 00:03:59,156 We're all on our own journey. 120 00:03:59,198 --> 00:04:00,574 What? No. Who told you that garbage? 121 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:01,742 I was gonna say, we need a backup plan 122 00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,243 so you can win this thing. 123 00:04:03,284 --> 00:04:04,578 If it starts slipping away, I'll pretend to choke, 124 00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:05,871 and then you give me the Heimlich 125 00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:07,622 and save my life in front of everyone. 126 00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:09,917 Aw, thanks for not trying to make me a better person. 127 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:11,376 - Love you too. - I love you. 128 00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:13,336 [Amy's mother] Amy, Jake! 129 00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:17,216 David and I both arrived an hour early. 130 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:18,633 We're sharing a French onion. 131 00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:20,260 Mother-- 132 00:04:20,301 --> 00:04:22,470 [David] So she's about to jump, and I say, 133 00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,681 this world is a good place, "Hey, I can't tell you 134 00:04:24,723 --> 00:04:26,934 it's better with you in it." but I guarantee you 135 00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:28,309 And she climbs down off the ledge, 136 00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:29,770 - and she gives me a big hug. - Ugh. 137 00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:31,479 before she won the Oscar? And that was 138 00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:32,981 really follow pop culture. I don't know, I don't 139 00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:35,025 to impress me, David. You never cease 140 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:36,526 Hey, speaking of impressive, [Jake] 141 00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,319 to the NYPD shooting range Amy just went 142 00:04:38,361 --> 00:04:40,697 certification in marksmanship. and received a gold 143 00:04:40,739 --> 00:04:42,241 the platinum certification. Oh, I just got 144 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,575 What? That exists? What did you do, 145 00:04:43,617 --> 00:04:45,119 curve the bullets, Wanted -style? 146 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:46,369 Yeah, I don't know what "Wanted" is. 147 00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:47,370 I don't follow pop culture. 148 00:04:47,412 --> 00:04:48,705 But I fired ten shots, 149 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:49,831 into the same hole. and they all went 150 00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:51,458 Oh, so you actually did. 151 00:04:51,499 --> 00:04:53,043 did you know that Amy Hey, Camila, 152 00:04:53,085 --> 00:04:54,253 is the youngest female sergeant 153 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:55,629 of the Nine-Nine? in the history 154 00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:57,256 Yes, I'm very proud of her. 155 00:04:57,297 --> 00:04:58,673 I'm proud of all my children. 156 00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:00,383 and the lieutenant. The sergeant 157 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:02,928 the lieutenant's exam? What? You passed 158 00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:04,805 It actually wasn't something I was planning on taking, 159 00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:06,640 but then my partner got sick and I wanted to be able 160 00:05:06,681 --> 00:05:08,267 to send home extra money to his wife and kids. 161 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,978 He was totally misdiagnosed. Then I read the MRI. 162 00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:13,230 So long story short, Bo is alive, 163 00:05:13,272 --> 00:05:15,232 on the test for no reason. and I got a perfect score 164 00:05:15,274 --> 00:05:16,524 Oh, man. 165 00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:18,277 these dinner rolls, huh? Hey, check out 166 00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:19,611 Love these bad boys. 167 00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:21,280 I'm just gonna chomp down on that, 168 00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:22,530 recklessly. 169 00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,407 [mimics choking] 170 00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:26,618 Oh! Oh, no, Jake! He's choking! 171 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:28,495 He has EMT training. Let David do it. 172 00:05:28,536 --> 00:05:30,371 - I'm gonna go to the bathroom. - I'm here for you, Jake. 173 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:31,915 You know what-- [exclaims] 174 00:05:31,957 --> 00:05:33,250 It is gonna hurt like hell. Don't worry. 175 00:05:33,292 --> 00:05:34,960 I think it's actually OK. 176 00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:36,377 [grunting] 177 00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:39,506 Thank you both so much for coming in. 178 00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:41,549 This is a safe space 179 00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:43,927 where choices are welcome. 180 00:05:43,969 --> 00:05:45,137 OK, now, I trust that both of you 181 00:05:45,179 --> 00:05:46,554 had a chance to review the script? 182 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:48,640 - Good. Now throw them away! - Yeah. 183 00:05:48,682 --> 00:05:50,684 What the hell? I wrote notes in the margin. 184 00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:52,393 Terry found his super-objective. 185 00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:55,814 I want to see you improvise without the safety net. 186 00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:58,733 I want to see you become Maxwell Blaze. 187 00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:02,029 So, Maxwell, what was your childhood like? 188 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,072 I was a lookout at 8, 189 00:06:04,114 --> 00:06:05,324 had my own corner at 10, 190 00:06:05,364 --> 00:06:06,992 trigger man at 13. 191 00:06:07,034 --> 00:06:10,162 to look a man in his eyes You know what it's like 192 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:11,705 as the life drains out of him? 193 00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:13,623 I was bad from a young age. 194 00:06:13,665 --> 00:06:15,374 At school, I pushed people. 195 00:06:15,416 --> 00:06:19,087 And this wasn't horseplay. This was pushing to hurt. 196 00:06:19,129 --> 00:06:20,547 Do you have a girlfriend at home? 197 00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:22,590 of me getting locked up. Used to. She got tired 198 00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:23,925 She's with my brother now. 199 00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:26,261 I never find his ass. He better hope 200 00:06:26,303 --> 00:06:29,430 and you should see her heavy, I do, 201 00:06:29,472 --> 00:06:30,932 feminine breasts, 202 00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,475 with their perfectly placed nipples. 203 00:06:32,517 --> 00:06:34,393 Don't get me started on her can. 204 00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:36,771 - What's your greatest fear? - I ain't scared of nothing. 205 00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:38,606 I'm scared she'll find out My girlfriend. 206 00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:40,275 about my mistress, 207 00:06:40,317 --> 00:06:42,610 who also has a perfect can. 208 00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:45,030 but it's harder. It's smaller, 209 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:46,656 Great. 210 00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:49,076 something totally different. You both have given me 211 00:06:49,117 --> 00:06:51,370 I've got a lot to think about. 212 00:06:51,410 --> 00:06:53,163 Thank you. Next! 213 00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:55,749 What up, dawgs? 214 00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:58,001 reading for Maxwell Blaze. Norm Scully, 215 00:06:58,043 --> 00:07:00,962 what anyone would do. Listen, I just did 216 00:07:01,004 --> 00:07:02,714 Hey, where'd you go? 217 00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,799 I just couldn't stand there while the whole restaurant 218 00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,509 gushed over David saving your life. 219 00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,095 Yeah, there was a standing ovation. 220 00:07:08,136 --> 00:07:10,597 Also, everyone saw you walk away while I was choking, 221 00:07:10,638 --> 00:07:11,973 and I don't want to say you're a villain now, 222 00:07:12,015 --> 00:07:14,142 but the B-word was tossed around a lot. 223 00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:15,852 Ugh. I'm sorry. 224 00:07:15,894 --> 00:07:17,396 I just can't be around him. 225 00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,147 - I shouldn't have come. - So let's leave. 226 00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:21,066 I'll tell everyone my stomach hurts, which it does. 227 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:23,026 I'm pretty sure he broke my rib when he gave me the Heimlich. 228 00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,694 Lieutenant Santiago, a word? 229 00:07:24,736 --> 00:07:27,530 Why is David's captain here? 230 00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:29,824 Is there a maniac on the loose, What's going on? 231 00:07:29,866 --> 00:07:31,076 and David's the only one who can catch him 232 00:07:31,118 --> 00:07:32,369 before he blows up a train? 233 00:07:32,411 --> 00:07:33,912 Oh, we could call him the Trainiac. 234 00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:35,538 We're focused on the same things. 235 00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,498 discovered a large quantity Sorry, folks, we've 236 00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:40,043 in Lieutenant Santiago's desk. of cocaine 237 00:07:40,085 --> 00:07:42,296 We've had to place him under arrest. 238 00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:47,675 Oh, no... 239 00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:52,222 Of course. We'll head over soon. 240 00:07:52,264 --> 00:07:53,681 So that was my brother. 241 00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:56,768 He needs me to bail him out of jail. 242 00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:58,353 I feel so awful for him. 243 00:07:58,395 --> 00:07:59,771 You are smiling so much. 244 00:07:59,813 --> 00:08:01,898 No, no, I promise. I feel so, so, bad. 245 00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:02,899 Rosa D! 246 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,567 - Deezer, what up? - Deezer? 247 00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:06,486 Hey, Scully, did you do something new with your hair? 248 00:08:06,527 --> 00:08:08,029 Same thing as always: put mousse in it 249 00:08:08,071 --> 00:08:09,948 then I watch a scary movie. while it's wet, 250 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:12,200 - [chuckles] You the man. - What is wrong with her? 251 00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:13,952 Her brother David got arrested. 252 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:15,829 - And you're happy about this? - He's a cokehead! 253 00:08:15,870 --> 00:08:17,622 That's savage. I love it. 254 00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:18,915 - I'm not happy about it! - All right. 255 00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:20,250 Calm down, Littlefinger. 256 00:08:20,292 --> 00:08:21,751 He's in a lot of trouble, you know. 257 00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:23,295 Yeah, yeah, you're right. You're right. 258 00:08:23,337 --> 00:08:25,213 It's a terrible situation. 259 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:27,048 - Let's go bail him out. - I know. 260 00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:29,217 Oh! Should I get my hair blown out first? 261 00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:32,262 I'm gonna have pictures from today for the rest of my life. 262 00:08:32,304 --> 00:08:35,223 a bad person? Are you... 263 00:08:35,265 --> 00:08:37,017 Casting's up! 264 00:08:37,058 --> 00:08:38,559 a high school play, Boyle. This is not 265 00:08:38,601 --> 00:08:39,644 who you went with. Just let us know 266 00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:40,687 OK, first of all, 267 00:08:40,728 --> 00:08:42,314 I want to say that this was 268 00:08:42,356 --> 00:08:44,441 one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. 269 00:08:44,483 --> 00:08:46,360 There is so much talent in this room. 270 00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:47,861 Just tell us, bitch. 271 00:08:47,902 --> 00:08:49,279 Act as if you already have the role. 272 00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:51,572 [Charles] I could have cast any one of you 273 00:08:51,614 --> 00:08:53,367 and put on a great show, 274 00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:54,617 but I had to make a call. 275 00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:56,411 We're all adults. Enough, Boyle. 276 00:08:56,453 --> 00:08:58,121 No one cares about this that much. 277 00:08:58,163 --> 00:08:59,664 - It's Captain Holt. - Captain Holt? 278 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,041 He was the worst one! 279 00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,751 No offense, but Holt was so unconvincing. 280 00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:05,212 He kept referring to his childhood 281 00:09:05,253 --> 00:09:06,838 as a soot-covered street urchin. 282 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:09,632 a Dickensian backstory, Yes, I gave myself 283 00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:12,010 made quite the impression. which apparently 284 00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:13,636 I'm sorry, Sarge. 285 00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:16,515 Honestly, I don't think I'm the right director 286 00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:19,559 to bring your vision of Maxwell Blaze to life. 287 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:21,019 What does that even mean? 288 00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,312 It means you blew it. 289 00:09:22,354 --> 00:09:24,981 Walk away, Jeffords. Walk away. 290 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:27,734 OK, this is gonna be my mantel shot. 291 00:09:27,775 --> 00:09:29,152 So every time Mom and Dad look at it, 292 00:09:29,194 --> 00:09:30,570 they'll be reminded of what David did. 293 00:09:30,611 --> 00:09:32,406 you should chill out, I would say 294 00:09:32,447 --> 00:09:33,781 but this is actually making me feel great 295 00:09:33,823 --> 00:09:35,616 about my family, so let's dive in. 296 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:38,370 Everybody say "possession with intent to distribute"! 297 00:09:38,412 --> 00:09:39,538 [David] Hey... 298 00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,289 - Ah, David, hi there. - Oh! 299 00:09:41,331 --> 00:09:42,790 to your recent arrest That was unrelated 300 00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:44,292 with intent to distribute. for possession 301 00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:45,710 - How are you? - Not great. 302 00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:47,212 Yeah, jail is rough. [Jake] 303 00:09:47,254 --> 00:09:48,547 in front of everyone. You got to go poop 304 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:50,215 I remember when I was in prison, 305 00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:51,799 and when I finally did go, I held it for weeks, 306 00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:53,176 it was... 307 00:09:53,218 --> 00:09:54,969 You know what, Jake? This isn't about you. 308 00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:56,804 So, David, did you get fired, 309 00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:58,681 or is there gonna be, like, a hearing? 310 00:09:58,723 --> 00:10:00,850 be there to support you. She's asking so she can 311 00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:02,227 Oh, yeah, I wouldn't miss it. 312 00:10:02,269 --> 00:10:04,062 - I'm so excited. - To support you. 313 00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:05,439 That's what I said. I'm really looking forward 314 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:06,689 - to being there. - To support you. 315 00:10:06,731 --> 00:10:08,316 Yeah, we're saying the same thing. 316 00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:10,193 - I am pumped this is happening. - All right, babe, 317 00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:11,611 maybe your brother doesn't want to talk about what happened. 318 00:10:11,652 --> 00:10:12,820 - Let's just go. - It's OK. 319 00:10:12,862 --> 00:10:14,531 I owe you guys an explanation. 320 00:10:14,573 --> 00:10:17,409 I actually started doing drugs when I was a teenager. 321 00:10:17,451 --> 00:10:20,454 put so much pressure on us? You know how Mom and Dad 322 00:10:20,495 --> 00:10:22,205 Eventually I just kind of cracked. 323 00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:24,124 [Amy] Wait, you felt pressure? 324 00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:26,209 You always seemed to effortlessly thrive 325 00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:28,503 at everything. I was so jealous. 326 00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:29,754 But knowing that you also felt the pressure-- 327 00:10:29,796 --> 00:10:31,172 we can drop the act. All right, 328 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,715 I just didn't know who was listening. 329 00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:34,050 - Everything I've said before - What act, now? 330 00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:35,635 just now is a lie. I'm being framed. 331 00:10:35,676 --> 00:10:37,262 I've been investigating these dirty cops 332 00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:39,013 who are being paid off by the Brazilian mob. 333 00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,308 Oh, Brazilian mobsters are so good-looking. 334 00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:43,435 Giseles, the women and the men. They're just a bunch of 335 00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:45,145 They're all gorgeous. Yes, it's insane. 336 00:10:45,186 --> 00:10:46,938 I think I got too close. Anyway, 337 00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:49,274 planted the drugs in my desk. Those dirty cops must have 338 00:10:49,316 --> 00:10:51,818 you're not addicted to cocaine? So what you're saying is, 339 00:10:51,859 --> 00:10:54,237 I don't even drink coffee. Amy, it's me. 340 00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:55,363 I have too much respect for my body. 341 00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:56,490 This is water. 342 00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:58,074 And you didn't feel pressure 343 00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,034 - No, they're so supportive. - from Mom and Dad? 344 00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:02,329 some constructive criticism. I'd actually love 345 00:11:02,370 --> 00:11:03,830 It's the only way to grow. 346 00:11:03,871 --> 00:11:05,915 Anyway, thank you so much for bailing me out. 347 00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:07,875 at home, I will clear my name, If you can just drop me off 348 00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:09,461 and things can go back to the way they were. 349 00:11:09,503 --> 00:11:10,837 The way they were. Great. 350 00:11:10,878 --> 00:11:13,590 It's my favorite way of things being. 351 00:11:13,632 --> 00:11:16,468 OK, Alfonso, I hope you like it here in holding. 352 00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:18,595 It's gonna be a while. 353 00:11:18,637 --> 00:11:20,013 [door closes] 354 00:11:20,054 --> 00:11:22,557 So... 355 00:11:22,599 --> 00:11:24,184 - what they got you in here for? - Drugs. 356 00:11:24,225 --> 00:11:26,936 They want me to flip, but I'm no snitch. 357 00:11:26,978 --> 00:11:29,439 I'd rather do the time. How about you? 358 00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:32,025 I pushed a man, just to see him frown. 359 00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:33,610 He is terrible. [laughs] 360 00:11:33,652 --> 00:11:37,155 Yeah, it's almost like casting a robotic old nerd 361 00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,490 was a huge mistake. 362 00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:40,367 Was it a mistake, Sarge? 363 00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:42,160 Or was it a stroke of brilliance? 364 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,911 - What are you talking about? - Look, you're a good actor. 365 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,830 You could even be a great one. But you're too gentle. 366 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,582 Life hasn't kicked you around enough. 367 00:11:47,624 --> 00:11:48,916 I mean, I grew up poor, 368 00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:50,502 and my father was emotionally abusive. 369 00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:51,752 It's not enough. 370 00:11:51,794 --> 00:11:53,338 You needed to be rejected by me, 371 00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,507 a man you admire so much. 372 00:11:55,549 --> 00:11:57,967 What? So all this was just to make me mad? 373 00:11:58,009 --> 00:12:00,595 I need you to feel the anger and resentment 374 00:12:00,637 --> 00:12:04,807 that Tyrone McCallister feels every single day of his life. 375 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,893 Who's Tyrone McCallister? 376 00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:08,353 You are. 377 00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:11,272 That's the part I wrote for you all along. 378 00:12:11,314 --> 00:12:12,815 This is so stupid, Boyle. [Rosa] 379 00:12:12,857 --> 00:12:14,150 You can't manipulate somebody like this 380 00:12:14,192 --> 00:12:15,527 and then expect them to get on board. 381 00:12:15,569 --> 00:12:16,695 Right, Sarge? 382 00:12:16,735 --> 00:12:18,863 Sarge? 383 00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:21,449 My name's Tyrone. 384 00:12:21,491 --> 00:12:22,741 Tyrone McGallagher. 385 00:12:22,783 --> 00:12:25,161 McCallister. 386 00:12:25,203 --> 00:12:26,913 So I checked up on David's case file. 387 00:12:26,954 --> 00:12:28,789 He passed his drug test. 388 00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:30,625 Apparently he has the cleanest blood they've ever seen. 389 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:32,085 I knew this was all too good to be true. 390 00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:33,961 Now David's gonna clear his name 391 00:12:34,003 --> 00:12:36,172 and singlehandedly take down drug dealers and dirty cops 392 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:37,924 and get another medal from the governor. 393 00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:39,718 It sounds pretty dangerous. Maybe we should help him. 394 00:12:39,758 --> 00:12:41,219 Pretty sure he can handle this on his own. 395 00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:42,679 That's never been a problem for him. 396 00:12:42,721 --> 00:12:45,265 All right, look, Ames. 397 00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:46,641 I never had a brother, 398 00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:47,934 but I know four guys who did, 399 00:12:47,975 --> 00:12:50,228 and they would have fights and squabbles, 400 00:12:50,270 --> 00:12:53,814 but in the end, they always had each other's shells. 401 00:12:53,856 --> 00:12:55,024 Are you talking about the Ninja Turtles? 402 00:12:55,066 --> 00:12:56,067 Of course I'm talking about 403 00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:57,569 - the Ninja Turtles! - Ugh. 404 00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:58,737 Look, if something happens to your brother, 405 00:12:58,777 --> 00:13:00,238 you are gonna regret it, 406 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:01,906 just like Raph regretted it when he abandoned Leo 407 00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:03,032 in the Technodrome with Krang. 408 00:13:03,074 --> 00:13:04,409 I don't know what that means. 409 00:13:04,451 --> 00:13:05,784 Well, that's on you. It's a classic. 410 00:13:05,826 --> 00:13:07,328 The point is, if your brother gets hurt 411 00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:09,289 and you don't get his back now, 412 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:10,831 it's gonna haunt you for the rest of your life. 413 00:13:10,873 --> 00:13:12,667 [sighs] You're right. 414 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,210 - Obviously you're right. - Thank you. 415 00:13:14,252 --> 00:13:15,754 If David gets killed by the Brazilian mafia, 416 00:13:15,794 --> 00:13:17,631 my parents' mantel is gonna become, like, 417 00:13:17,672 --> 00:13:19,215 - No, that's not what I meant. - a permanent shrine to him. 418 00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:20,634 Oh, the thought of it makes me want to puke. 419 00:13:20,675 --> 00:13:21,968 You've learned the wrong lesson. 420 00:13:22,009 --> 00:13:23,386 Come on, let's go help the bastard. 421 00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:24,554 Don't love how we got here, 422 00:13:24,596 --> 00:13:25,888 but we're going where I want. 423 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,477 {\an8}I'm glad you guys are here. 424 00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:32,228 {\an8}So this place is run by the Brazilian mob. 425 00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:33,812 My CI tells me there's a ledger with all the cops on payroll 426 00:13:33,854 --> 00:13:35,148 hidden in here somewhere. 427 00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:36,149 it's in that room I'm guessing 428 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,191 surrounded by armed guards. 429 00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:38,318 Those are guards? [Jake] 430 00:13:38,359 --> 00:13:39,527 I thought they were models. 431 00:13:39,569 --> 00:13:41,321 We need a plan to get past them. 432 00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:42,905 So here's what I'm thinking. I speak a little Portuguese 433 00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:44,783 from that time I opened a school in the favelas of Rio. 434 00:13:44,823 --> 00:13:45,908 - Ugh, barf. - What? 435 00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,285 I said barf. 436 00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:48,662 I can't deal with your bragging anymore. 437 00:13:48,703 --> 00:13:49,828 How is that bragging? 438 00:13:49,870 --> 00:13:51,539 I said I speak a little Portuguese 439 00:13:51,581 --> 00:13:53,040 when I'm actually fluent. [speaks Portuguese] 440 00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:54,793 Ugh, shut up! 441 00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:56,877 Look, if you're so angry with me, why are you even here? 442 00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:58,713 Because Jake convinced me if you die, 443 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,340 I'd never hear the end of it from Mom and Dad. 444 00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:01,882 That's not exactly how I phrased it. 445 00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:03,384 Look, I get it. You're jealous. 446 00:14:03,426 --> 00:14:05,679 I'd be jealous too if someone was better than me 447 00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:07,096 at everything their whole life. 448 00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:09,015 - [scoffs] Not everything. - Oh, no. 449 00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:10,975 - I have more allergies than you. - Not the best brag. 450 00:14:11,017 --> 00:14:12,727 I have so many allergies, I just found out 451 00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:14,895 - I'm allergic to chia seeds. - But apparently effective. 452 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:17,231 I'm allergic to chia and acai berries. 453 00:14:17,273 --> 00:14:19,275 Yeah? My throat gets scratchy when I eat stone fruit. 454 00:14:19,317 --> 00:14:23,070 Oh, yeah? I'm also a better dancer than you. 455 00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,448 misjudged your own abilities. Ames, you have badly 456 00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,367 You think you're better than me? 457 00:14:28,159 --> 00:14:29,452 Oh, damn... [Jake] 458 00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:31,120 She's got a shot. 459 00:14:32,079 --> 00:14:33,998 {\an8}What, afraid to use your forearms? 460 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,082 Pretty good. 461 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:37,001 You're not using enough elbow! 462 00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:39,420 Guys, those aren't the parts people feature when they dance. 463 00:14:39,462 --> 00:14:41,464 Now can we please find a way to distract those guards? 464 00:14:41,506 --> 00:14:44,091 Don't worry, Jake, 'cause I'm about to end this thing. 465 00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:45,593 Death drop! 466 00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:47,261 [grunts] Ow! 467 00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:48,805 Ow, ow, ow! 468 00:14:48,847 --> 00:14:50,473 - Oh, that looked really bad. - Are you OK? 469 00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:52,266 Oh, look, the guards are leaving their post. 470 00:14:52,308 --> 00:14:53,309 Looks like they're coming here to help you. 471 00:14:53,351 --> 00:14:54,602 Jake, you should go now. 472 00:14:54,644 --> 00:14:56,688 - Yes, I'm "fone." - Are you sure? 473 00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:57,980 as long as you're "fone." Oh, well, 474 00:14:58,022 --> 00:14:59,858 - All right, fine. - Jake, go. 475 00:15:01,860 --> 00:15:03,444 [Ray] Believe me, they're perfect. 476 00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:04,945 They're about 5 1/2 pounds each, 477 00:15:04,987 --> 00:15:08,282 and they look so good smushed together. 478 00:15:08,324 --> 00:15:09,492 Or dangling. 479 00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:10,869 [door opens] 480 00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:13,538 Get off me, man. [quietly] 481 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:14,622 Hey. 482 00:15:14,664 --> 00:15:16,583 - Cops, man. - Hey. 483 00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:18,251 - Mm-hmm. - Word. 484 00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,294 your lawyer's here. McCallister, 485 00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:21,962 - He wants to talk to you. - Already? 486 00:15:22,004 --> 00:15:24,382 What the hell, man? I was just getting started. 487 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:25,925 And yet it felt like forever. 488 00:15:25,966 --> 00:15:29,095 You were playing at Alfonso, not with Alfonso. 489 00:15:29,136 --> 00:15:31,180 What are you doing right now, Sarge? 490 00:15:31,222 --> 00:15:32,766 - Listening to you? - Yes, listening. 491 00:15:32,807 --> 00:15:35,101 What humans do 95% of the time 492 00:15:35,142 --> 00:15:36,977 and Tyrone does, apparently, none of the time. 493 00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:39,773 I want you to go back in there and listen. 494 00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:41,941 - Can you do that for me? - Yeah, OK, jeez. 495 00:15:41,982 --> 00:15:44,485 I mean, you know, look, take the note about Tyrone or don't. 496 00:15:44,527 --> 00:15:46,946 what do I know? But also, I created him. 497 00:15:46,987 --> 00:15:48,281 [sighs] 498 00:15:48,322 --> 00:15:49,783 Hey. 499 00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:55,079 [door opens] 500 00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:57,081 McCallister, your lawyer has more questions for you. 501 00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:58,374 - Why were you doing that? - What? 502 00:15:58,416 --> 00:16:00,042 You said I should listen! 503 00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:02,420 Well, listening doesn't always mean being quiet. 504 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,130 Sometimes, the only way to listen 505 00:16:04,171 --> 00:16:05,590 is to say something. 506 00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:07,467 I'm listening to you right now. 507 00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:09,886 Do you see how I listen? This is me listening. 508 00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:11,429 You're pissing me off, Boyle! 509 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:13,556 Ah, and he's back! Hold on to that aggression. 510 00:16:13,598 --> 00:16:14,766 Yeah, go! Go, go, go! 511 00:16:14,808 --> 00:16:16,016 [clapping] 512 00:16:17,184 --> 00:16:18,937 What are you looking at? 513 00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,772 McCallister. 514 00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:22,649 Terry, Terry, Terry. 515 00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,484 I need you to help me see what I'm not seeing. 516 00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:25,693 Why can't you do this? 517 00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:27,528 You're giving me too many notes! 518 00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:30,698 OK, well, then I can boil it down for you into one note: 519 00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:32,283 Tyrone is an ocean. 520 00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:33,910 I don't know what that means. 521 00:16:33,952 --> 00:16:35,703 It means I want you to be tough but vulnerable, 522 00:16:35,745 --> 00:16:37,872 brave but scared, jittery but perfectly still. 523 00:16:37,914 --> 00:16:40,249 Also, pace it up a little. Come on, buddy, you got this. 524 00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:42,168 Man, these stupid cops won't leave me alone. 525 00:16:42,209 --> 00:16:44,128 What the hell? They think I'm a snitch? 526 00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:45,588 - I hear that. - Not me. 527 00:16:45,630 --> 00:16:46,798 McCallister, I need to talk to you. 528 00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:48,007 - Excuse me? - No! 529 00:16:48,048 --> 00:16:49,342 I don't want any more notes. 530 00:16:49,383 --> 00:16:50,802 I've gone undercover before. 531 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:52,595 and let me do this! Now just back off 532 00:16:54,639 --> 00:16:56,056 Uh-oh, Alfonso, 533 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:59,018 seems as though we got a pig in our midst. 534 00:16:59,059 --> 00:17:00,520 Looks like we can only trust each other. 535 00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:02,605 you're obviously a cop too. Come on, man, 536 00:17:02,647 --> 00:17:04,899 about how nefarious you are. You keep talking 537 00:17:04,941 --> 00:17:06,609 [Amy] Jake, let us in! 538 00:17:06,651 --> 00:17:08,152 I think she's gonna be OK, 539 00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:09,779 but she's probably got a low-grade concussion. 540 00:17:09,821 --> 00:17:11,906 I wish you hadn't tried to do a death drop. 541 00:17:11,948 --> 00:17:14,325 The ladies on "Drag Race" make it look so easy. 542 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:15,952 that reference because I know, you don't get 543 00:17:15,994 --> 00:17:17,912 - you don't have a television. - Why? 544 00:17:17,954 --> 00:17:20,247 Amy, I'm sorry for getting so competitive back there. 545 00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:22,166 You guys are helping me out, and I should just be grateful. 546 00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:24,502 Of course you're being nice to me when I'm being a monster. 547 00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:26,170 Well, you know what, Mr. Perfect? 548 00:17:26,212 --> 00:17:27,588 I'm gonna find that ledger, 549 00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:28,965 and I'm gonna save your stupid butt. 550 00:17:29,007 --> 00:17:31,384 - That would be so great. - Please stop. 551 00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:32,426 Maybe there's a hidden panel somewhere? 552 00:17:32,468 --> 00:17:33,511 It's not in the desk. 553 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:34,846 I bet it's in this old safe. 554 00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:36,180 a lot of work to open That seems like 555 00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:37,640 you have to pay a bribe. every time 556 00:17:37,682 --> 00:17:40,727 in this filing cabinet. I would keep it 557 00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:44,480 I found it! [gasps] 558 00:17:44,522 --> 00:17:46,106 I beat the golden boy! I'm the golden girl! 559 00:17:46,148 --> 00:17:47,901 - [man outside] Hey, open up! - [pounding on door] 560 00:17:47,942 --> 00:17:49,235 - [man outside] Who's in there? - OK, everybody out. 561 00:17:49,276 --> 00:17:50,570 Go! Go, go, go! 562 00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:53,072 [♪♪♪] 563 00:17:53,113 --> 00:17:54,574 Hey, get off me! 564 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,743 My God, you're even more stunning up close. 565 00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:58,452 [groans] 566 00:18:00,788 --> 00:18:02,331 I called for backup, but it could take ten minutes. 567 00:18:02,373 --> 00:18:03,624 - Should we storm the place? - Too late. 568 00:18:03,666 --> 00:18:05,251 they're bringing Jake out. Look, 569 00:18:05,292 --> 00:18:07,879 office because I work there, I told you, I was in the 570 00:18:07,921 --> 00:18:09,380 and we've actually met a bunch of times, 571 00:18:09,422 --> 00:18:10,715 you don't remember me! and it's crazy 572 00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:12,008 What should we do? If they get away, 573 00:18:12,050 --> 00:18:13,467 we'll never be able to track them. 574 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,053 Shoot out the tires. 575 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,387 You're a way better shot than me. 576 00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:17,889 - What? Are you crazy? - You should do it. 577 00:18:17,931 --> 00:18:19,515 - You're the golden girl. - David, take the shot. 578 00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:20,600 I just don't want you to feel bad about yourself-- 579 00:18:20,641 --> 00:18:21,768 Take the shot! 580 00:18:21,809 --> 00:18:23,185 [tires squealing] 581 00:18:24,186 --> 00:18:25,813 [crashing] 582 00:18:25,855 --> 00:18:28,691 You're under arrest, you beautiful man. 583 00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:31,027 Cuff this son of a bitch. 584 00:18:31,069 --> 00:18:33,404 you also smell so good. Oh, my God, 585 00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:36,032 [laughs] Brazil! 586 00:18:36,074 --> 00:18:37,909 All right, so first things first, 587 00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:39,493 I think I owe you both something, 588 00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:42,288 and it's this. 589 00:18:42,329 --> 00:18:44,373 Stop clapping! There's nothing to clap about. 590 00:18:44,415 --> 00:18:46,626 Look, I know you're upset, but everything went great. 591 00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:48,419 You ruined this mission. Great? 592 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:50,046 Yeah, we might have gotten him to talk 593 00:18:50,088 --> 00:18:51,798 if you didn't give me notes every two seconds. 594 00:18:51,839 --> 00:18:54,341 Guys, you performed exactly the way I expected you to. 595 00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:57,053 It's just that you were both supporting characters. 596 00:18:57,095 --> 00:18:58,679 I did what you asked. Hey, Boyle, 597 00:18:58,721 --> 00:18:59,931 Alfonso told me everything. 598 00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:01,099 Yes! I knew it would work. 599 00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,600 What? What's going on? 600 00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:04,393 You were never my real star, Sarge. 601 00:19:04,435 --> 00:19:06,020 But I needed to create a scene 602 00:19:06,062 --> 00:19:08,314 so that Alfonso would think that my mission had failed. 603 00:19:08,355 --> 00:19:09,983 Then I could send in... 604 00:19:10,024 --> 00:19:13,111 gun smuggler by later night. Ricki Sheetz, DJ by night, 605 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,654 Alfonso started telling me 606 00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:16,238 about all the crazy crap you guys pulled in there. 607 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:17,698 He just couldn't stop talking 608 00:19:17,740 --> 00:19:19,241 till he gave me the name of his supplier. 609 00:19:19,283 --> 00:19:21,661 Rosa was my leading lady from the start. 610 00:19:21,702 --> 00:19:23,245 - She's the only good actor here. - She is? 611 00:19:23,287 --> 00:19:24,705 Yeah, you know nothing about my real life. 612 00:19:24,747 --> 00:19:27,291 - I'm always acting. - Well done, Boyle. 613 00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:29,877 You've executed this mission flawlessly. I'm impressed. 614 00:19:29,919 --> 00:19:32,171 Wait, if you were gonna use Diaz the whole time, 615 00:19:32,212 --> 00:19:33,631 why didn't you just tell us that? 616 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:35,133 Because you two would have given it away 617 00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,383 with your terrible acting. 618 00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:37,802 No offense, but I can read 619 00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:39,887 every emotion you're feeling on your face. 620 00:19:39,929 --> 00:19:41,806 - Can you read this one? - Actually, yes. 621 00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:44,142 You're trying to be tough, but inside, 622 00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:47,812 you're super impressed by what I've accomplished today. 623 00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:50,272 Damn, you're right. You're good. 624 00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:53,067 Thank you, everyone, for joining me again. 625 00:19:53,109 --> 00:19:54,777 You're my hero. To David. 626 00:19:54,819 --> 00:19:56,946 You saved my butt. And to Amy. 627 00:19:56,988 --> 00:19:59,198 You're a great cop and a great sister. 628 00:19:59,239 --> 00:20:03,036 Wow. That means a lot coming from you. 629 00:20:03,077 --> 00:20:04,453 You've always been a role model for me. 630 00:20:04,495 --> 00:20:06,122 He's everyone's role model. [mother] 631 00:20:06,164 --> 00:20:07,456 That's why he's on the mantel. 632 00:20:07,498 --> 00:20:09,125 [clears throat] 633 00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:11,418 I have to go to the bathroom. 634 00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:13,504 [music playing] 635 00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,089 Hey, are you OK? 636 00:20:15,131 --> 00:20:16,549 Yeah, I just had to go to the bathroom, like I said. 637 00:20:16,590 --> 00:20:18,092 Oh, great. I thought you went in there 638 00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:19,593 to give yourself a pep talk in the mirror 639 00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:21,095 like the girl from the deodorant commercial. 640 00:20:21,137 --> 00:20:22,513 I don't know what you're referring to. 641 00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:23,681 She wants the big promotion, 642 00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:25,099 but there's just one problem. 643 00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:26,976 She got skunk pit. We'll watch it later. 644 00:20:27,018 --> 00:20:28,602 The point is, I came to comfort you. 645 00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:31,689 Aw, thanks, but I actually feel really great. 646 00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:34,608 I've spent my whole life trying to beat David at something, 647 00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:37,403 but when you were in danger, 648 00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:39,572 I just didn't care anymore. 649 00:20:39,613 --> 00:20:42,200 All I wanted was for you to be OK. 650 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,827 I may never have the mantel, but it doesn't matter, 651 00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:46,120 'cause I have you. 652 00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:47,413 Well, I'm very proud of you, 653 00:20:47,454 --> 00:20:48,664 and I also wish you had told me that 654 00:20:48,706 --> 00:20:50,166 before you went to the bathroom, 655 00:20:50,208 --> 00:20:51,834 because I really roasted your mom back there. 656 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,087 {\an8}And another thing, you should appreciate Amy more, 657 00:20:54,128 --> 00:20:55,504 {\an8}because she's amazing. 658 00:20:55,546 --> 00:20:57,215 {\an8}And another thing, when you come to visit us, 659 00:20:57,256 --> 00:20:58,591 {\an8}you don't have to bring your own coffee. 660 00:20:58,632 --> 00:20:59,926 {\an8}Our coffee is fine. 661 00:20:59,967 --> 00:21:01,594 {\an8}And another thing, I know enough Spanish 662 00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:03,221 {\an8}to understand what idiota means! 663 00:21:03,262 --> 00:21:04,555 {\an8}And another thing! 664 00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:06,682 {\an8}When you say I have an "interesting nose," 665 00:21:06,724 --> 00:21:08,726 {\an8}I know you mean big! 666 00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,436 {\an8}I got lost in it. 667 00:21:10,477 --> 00:21:12,396 {\an8}There were, like, 35 "another things." 668 00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:14,190 {\an8}- I'm so sorry. - It's OK. 669 00:21:14,232 --> 00:21:15,733 {\an8}You were defending my honor. 670 00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:17,317 {\an8}And I'm glad you said something. 671 00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:19,570 {\an8}So should I go back and apologize to your mom? 672 00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:20,821 {\an8}Oh, hell no. We're sneaking out the back. 673 00:21:20,863 --> 00:21:22,489 {\an8}Oh, thank God. She is terrifying. 674 00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:24,283 {\an8}See ya at Thanksgiving, Mrs. Santiago. 675 00:21:24,324 --> 00:21:26,410 {\an8}- Not a doctor. - Shh. 676 00:21:26,452 --> 00:21:28,704 {\an8}Fremulon.